Learning to be Mommy


Some women are born to be moms & wives. It’s just in their DNA.

They rise before the sun, run 9 miles, cook a well-balanced breakfast for the whole family, get everyone out the door on time (or keep them home, whatever), keep a house clean (not just free of trip-hazards), bake made-from-scratch cookies every day, get all the laundry done (AND folded AND put away), sew adorable outfits for their 27 children, think of things like cutting sandwiches into shapes, and buy 20 bags of healthy, organic, GMO-free groceries for $30 after super-couponing…all without batting an eyelash.

That ain’t me.

I’m the woman who’s perpetually 10 (15, 20) minutes late for nearly everything, who once drove across town after forgetting to buckle my toddler into her carseat, who can’t leave a store (ANY store) without purchasing at least one item, who’s constantly exhausted because my subconscious smells freedom as soon as the kids are asleep & promptly re-energizes.

I can cook, but I rarely enjoy it (unless it involves beating a raw chicken with a blunt instrument).

Besides, food always tastes better when someone else prepares it. I am adamant about buying GMO-free food, however, although I rarely walk out of the store having paid less than $200. Someday!


I joke that I’m building my children’s immune systems, so I don’t vacuum. (Actually, there is an element of truth to that.) But I actually do clean…begrudgingly…because I know that, as soon as I’m “finished,” someone will come along and destroy it…be it husband, child, or 4-legged companion. (Ever notice that kitties puke on everything you love? And the dog will always choose the carpet over the tile floor.)

Let’s face it. Cleaning is never done.

Yeah, I’m crafty.

I’ve made my own hummingbird food, cross stitched several patterns, photoshopped pictures (& put them on stamps, mugs, mouse pads, and more, all to the amazement of family & friends), and beaded my own jewelry (but I kinda have to do that to use up all the beads & components I bought during that phase when I, apparently, drank too much wine and decided to start a jewelry business).

Let’s just say, I’m not always good at finishing what I start, but my intentions are sincere!

And I can’t even jog for two minutes without being out of breath…9 miles is Mt. Kilimanjaro, thank you very much.

Once upon a time, before children and medical treatments, I was a fitness trainer. A darn good one, too! Now I’m a candidate for The Biggest Loser. Oh, how the mighty have fallen! (Or widened, as it were.) But I’m gunning to complete Tough Mudder in 2013, so this paragraph will be rendered obsolete eventually. (Then all you mamas running 9 miles are going DOWN.)

See? So imperfect. So flawed.

But I’m learning. Aren’t we all?

When I had my first child (almost 3 years ago), I “knew” it wouldn’t be easy…but in my heart, I though, “Ha! I got this!”

So really, I didn’t know anything at all.

Now I’ve got two children…and I know even less! But I wear it better now.

(It’s nice being confident in what I don’t know.)

So while my family might not always get a home-cooked meal (sometimes a pre-made, frozen lasagna is just how it goes) and the house may just be tidy & deathtrap-free instead of spotless & pristine and some projects might sit unfinished for a few months (years, decades) and maybe the laundry sits in baskets all clean & stuff, just waiting for something to happen…well, I learn a little more every day.

And every day, I get a little closer to being the mommy I want to be.

So follow along as I share what I learn, how I fail, when I succeed, and what I accomplish. If nothing else, you might just get a good laugh out of it.

Oh, and don’t take me too seriously. My humor tends to be…well, not funny. Or so I’m told. (I think I’m hilarious.)

Welcome to my world!

About Alyssa

I'm a home schooling mommy of two children. When I'm not cleaning, cooking, kissing owies, doing laundry, or rescuing pets from kiddie hands, I've been known to write, garden, play on my Kindle, peruse Pinterest, start (& sometime finish) DIY projects, edit pictures, play video games, and get crafty. Rumor is I'll be dragging my behind onto the treadmill. I love Thai food and historical romance novels. I'm wrapping up my PR degree & would love to get into editing eventually. Purple is the best color on earth, but it has a silly name.

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